Breakthrough!!

I am pretty positive I have pinpointed the reason why I have not been losing weight up to this point: I wasn't doing this for the right reasons!

When I started in July working out with Paula, I wanted to get healthy, but I was doing it because my sister and my brother-in-law were both getting married. Ashley got married in August and Curtis got married in November. My goals were based on what I thought I needed to look like for those occasions, instead of what I needed to look like for me! I had good intentions that were meant to be sincere, but I wasn't committed to the process for the right reasons!

After their weddings, the holidays hit. I was determined not to forsake all of the hard work that I had put in, and I didn't. But it still was a struggle to exercise. It was a struggle to eat good. It was a STRUGGLE. PERIOD! Until a couple weeks ago!

I don't know exactly the moment, but suddenly things started clicking. I started this blog. I started food journaling. I took my first nutrition class, and things started to turn around. I quit drinking Diet Coke and starting drinking water. I also did something momentous: working out harder at home than I do when I go see Paula. I love seeing Paula; I want my body to reflect that! So, I have been working out like a mad dog at home now too, and I am actually starting to crave exercise, if you can believe that!

I even woke up this morning at 5 knowing that I had to exercise. My brain was like the peppy cheerleader of LET'S GO, while my body was like SLEEP, MORE SLEEP, PLEASE! The brain eventually won out!

The difference for me is that this process is now about one person: ME ME ME ME ME ME!!!

I really couldn't be happier. It is not about how I should look in a picture at a wedding. It is not about the way others look at me, or what they think about me. It is ALL ABOUT HOW I FEEL! It is all about how exercising, eating no more than 1700 calories per day and a balance diet, and losing inches and pounds makes me feel!

I even proudly owned my number on the scale tonight at my second nutrition class! 208.5...It is coming down too!!! It takes courage to admit that, but it is a number I have to own in order to change things in my life! This time is truly going to be different!!! I can feel it all over!!!